A Day in The Life Of...

A Year Already!?

2011-10-11T13:19:00.000-07:00

Just over a year ago I had a baby. I still sit on the couch sometimes watching my son and think "holy crap, I have a baby!" It is still surreal to me. I have been blessed with such a good baby. He slept 12 hrs at about 3 months. There really isn't anything he doesn't eat. He wakes up happy. More and more he seems like his dad... this gives you some indication of how long I sleep for, what I eat and how I wake up.

In the past year I have learned a lot about myself - mainly how much I can tolerate or how much I want to tolerate. As much as Nori is a good sleeper and eater, he does occasionally have a loud crying/screaming fit. My patience is little to nonexistent when this happens. While he is audibly screaming, I am silently screaming. I imagine many things in my head - I won't put them here because someone may call children's services on me. Let's be honest here... when your child is screaming/crying at 1am and you have fed, changed and tried to comfort them and all they really want is out of their room. How do I know this? He's reaching for the door. It's frustrating and you think... hmm... how can I shut them up? One thing I never understood is why parents hit their children for crying - really?? You hit them for crying and guess what? They are STILL CRYING!! Stupid. When I get to the point of frustration in my mind where I am less comforting to him, I say to him "I am done". I put him in his crib and walk away. Sometimes my husband goes in but we wait a few minutes and he's out. I should feel so honoured and loved that someone intensely cries just so they can spend more time with me - my husband doesn't even do that. But I don't feel honoured... I feel tired. It's one thing when I inflict staying up late upon myself but when my child does it... not cool.

At about 6-8 months, when my son started crawling and pulling himself up on everything, it was time to teach him what not to touch. The television and everything connected to it, was one of those things. At first we would tell him no - remove him from the area... no - remove him from the area... no - remove him from the area. I typically like to give him a choice to move at first but I don't think he understands. Although, he will look at me while I am telling him no and (while still looking at me) he will reach out his chubby finger and poke the speaker. A friend told me they use the word 'stop' instead of no because they don't want their child yelling no to them all the time and No will be used in times of real concern or danger. GREAT IDEA! So, my husband and I have implemented this. Now I sound like I'm sending a telegram.

"Nori. Stop. Please don't touch that. Stop. Nori. stop. don't touch the speakers. stop."

Our son was really good at not touching the television or speakers. We had a friend come over with their son and they were 'playing together' - as much as a 10-11 month old can play with one another - just mainly consists of taking toys from one another and poking one another in the eye or smacking one another in the head/face. So my friend's son decided to touch and almost rip down our speaker - this is not a big deal to me because it's replaceable but if my son was in someone else's home I would expect him to not touch it. Since this happened, my son has consistently been going towards the speakers and television touching and pulling on them. It took months to 'train' him and about 5 seconds to destroy that. He rarely ever touched the television but he has recently started. In my heart of heart I fully believe he thinks it's one big iPad. He will touch it with one finger and when it doesn't do anything, the smack down comes out. So for the next few months it will be

"Nori, Stop. It's not an iPad. Stop. You aren't supposed to touch the TV. Stop"

Dilemma

2011-04-20T21:31:00.001-07:00

Here's a dilemma I have.. I want to blog about certain topics/people but find myself feeling guilty about posting negative things about them. They are mostly about celebrities. I found myself writing a post about how self involved Oprah was and I had to delete it because I felt bad and thought "what if she reads this?" Like she would ever read this blog. She's busy running a magazine, OWNing a Network, and saving the world one car/trip at a time.

So I ask, what do you do?? Do you just say forget it and blog away anyway or do you find something more inspiring to write about? Tonight, I have chosen the later.

I find that the world is getting more worse everyday. I would like to think there is more positivity out there; More stories out there of people helping strangers in the house next door or in the country across the ocean. But all I read is crap about the Royal Wedding (which to some may give hope of happily ever afters being real), Celebrities who are only famous because they happen to be in the right place at the right time, war, lying politicians, etc. Don't get me wrong, I have seen the generosities of thousands donating money to Japan relief or whatever the devestation of the day is. I don't mean to sound crass about it but it appears that we (generalization) tend to help more when it is something so terrible... why can we not help our neighbour who cannot carry the groceries to their door? or the person crying in the cafeteria?

My goal is to look for the positive story and to share it with you. Positive stories that DO NOT involve celebrities that seem to only want to boost their own egos or reputation. You know, the ones who happen to be interviewed about their 'good cause' *ahem* Oprah. Well, I like the silent heroes. The ones who go without being noticed or go without recognition from their friends, family or world.

To start, here is a story that I love.

The irony in this story is that Oprah is the inspiration behind this. She had an episode where she gave her audience members $1000 to do whatever they wanted with it as long as they helped someone. A lot of people were inspired to do something good that were NOT on the show. One person in particular, who for legal reasons we shall call Lucy, was moved by Oprah's gesture and decided she would raise $1000 to help someone in her community. She managed to find friends in her circle willing to donate $100 each. Lucy managed to get over $1000.

Once she received all this money she was excited to start doing something with it. She thought of donating to the Food Bank, homeless Shelters etc. Then as if inspiration struck her, she contacted someone in her church and asked about a few families in need. The families needed to write out a wish list and Lucy would do her best to try and buy for one of the families she had chosen. In the end Lucy had the wish lists of 3 families to choose from.

With the money she received she was able to choose all 3 families and buy them pretty much everything on their wish list. Lucy loved being able to shop with other people's money but more to buy toys, jewellery and clothes for people she did not know very well. She was not the best gift wrapper in the world but she took care in wrapping each gift and when she saw a little girl wearing a necklace she had bought for one of the families she was overjoyed. The families never knew what she had done and to this day do not know. The best part is that she knows she was able to make some wishes come true that Christmas.

Some could look at this as what Christmas should mean (other than Jesus of course) but I look at this as a pretty good example of pure charity. Lucy thought nothing of herself but more about those families. She could have chosen just one family but she chose all three families. In her heart of hearts she hopes those families will always remember that Christmas and in some way pay it forward to others.

Just Breathe

2011-03-31T08:57:00.001-07:00

There are moments in life when we are forced to stop (figuratively speaking). They cause that unforgettable lump in our throat that no matter how hard we try we cannot swallow it away. This morning I find myself trying desperately to swallow the lump away but it remains. There generally are no words that really convey how one feels when death occurs. Often times we say "unbelievable" or "tragic" or something of the like.

Tears are streaming down my face and yet they are not my tears. They belong to those affected by moments and events in time that forever change them. Even within the midst of death and other tragedies there is a light and a hope. A hope for a better tomorrow, a better outcome. A hope that those of us still here have enough time to make wrongs right and to love others more. A hope for healing. We cannot live in the past - it is gone. We need to live for the future because that is what is ahead. I want to make my 'right now' matter and memorable. I sometimes pause and take a mental picture in my mind - I even blink longer. I find myself going into my son's bedroom at night to "check on him" but I just like to stare at him and see how peaceful he is - not a care in the world. I hug him a little longer. Never has there been anything that has brought this much joy and love into my life.

I have always been grateful for the trials in my life because they bring me back to the centre. They make me stronger and able to help others. I am grateful to believe that there is life after death - there is joy. I am grateful that when I married my husband that I did this for eternity and that my family will be together after we die. I know that I cannot guarantee I will be here tomorrow. So I live for today. I live for my family.

My husband bought me a ring recently and he wanted to save it for a special occasion. I discovered the purchase on our Visa statement by accident when looking over bills. He gave it to me anyway (after my excitable begging to have it now) - there were no flowers or a special dinner that he planned. I was okay with this because we do not know what is going to happen tomorrow. Dave may have planned an elaborate evening but what if... So if you have a bottle of wine or something similar waiting for a special occasion - that occasion is today. Open it up and celebrate whatever you want. This is one of my favourite songs.

I think God wants us to stop and sometimes the only way to do that is through hard times. I hope that I am not compelled to stop but rather do it of my accord. I write this post with all the intentions of heart to enjoy life and to not worry about menial things like how clean my house is or if the weather will be nice tomorrow. Ralph Waldo Emerson said "it's not the length of life, but the depth."

Clean Slate of Sorts

2011-01-20T12:24:00.000-08:00

Always with the start of a new year we think of the past year and all the things we loved and hated. For me, I never want to live with regrets. Even with mistakes I have made, I never regret making them. They have made me who I am and I am happy with that. So instead of making resolutions for the year (which I hate) I have a word for the year and a phrase.

When thinking up my word for the year and my phrase of the year I really had to look at where and what I want to be. First, there are moments of deja vu and I think "I am exactly where I am supposed to be right now" which means that everything is as it should be. I believe that everything happens for a reason - good and bad. We make a choice on how we react to those situations - positively or negatively. I choose to make lemonade out of my lemons. This is how I came to my decision for the Phrase and Word

2011 Word of the Year: Patience

If anyone can attest to my patience, or lack therof, it's my husband. He likes to tell me often how I do not have a lot of patience. The place in which my patience is severly lacking is in the car. Seriously, there are some morons out there driving in their cars. Most of them happen to be on their phones chatting or texting. This has become a HUGE pet peeve of mine. Since having a baby I have realized how much patience I lacked and how much I have gained. That seems funny but seriously when Nori is angry and crying up a storm, I ahve really learned to breathe deep.

I will hopefully breathe deep when working out 3x a week and not seeing the results I want and try to remember that everyone is different and those skinny b@#!$#^ out there just have good genes.

I will try not to just get through the day or rush through something because before I realize Nori will be walking and telling me off for grounding him. I intend to enjoy more of the moments and take pictures of them in my mind to recall at times of impatience.

I will take time to myself to read and meditate in whatever way is comfortable to me. I do not intend to sit in a position and say "ohm" but I intend to be still at times other than sleeping.

2011 Phrase of the Year: I choose to be...

My phrase of the year is really something I tend to live by. When I was in my 20s I remember someone saying nobody can make you angry, you choose to be angry. There are a number of situations in my life in which I could have chosen to be angry. Anger has a way of controlling you in the same way that happiness does but often times when we are happy we don't realize it.

I choose to be happy.

I choose to angry.

I choose to be sad.

I choose to make the best out of every bad situation I am in.

I choose to let my husband win at video games - it's good for his ego.

I choose to laugh.

I choose to be present in my life.

I choose to stop and smell the roses.

Breast Feeding

2010-11-12T00:45:00.000-08:00

So as most of you know, I have had my baby. I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, Nori, on September 28, 2010. He weighed 7lbs 8ounces. He was 20.5 inches long. He did not come out the conventional way - I had a c-section. I do not regret it because if I had pushed any longer it would have been an emergency c-section and I did not want to put my baby in distress. The labour story itself is very long and amusing at times. I say amusing now because I am not in the moment anymore. I am just glad that I did not go into the delivery room with a set plan in mind because after 45 hours of labor one cannot really be set in stone with their ideals. Babies come out whatever way they want... not what I want.

ANYWAY, this post is about breast feeding. I recently decided not to breast feed. It was not an easy decision but I feel it was the right decision. There are numerous reasons why. My intention was to breast feed for as long as possible. Who knew that 4 weeks was what 'as long as possible' meant. Nori unfortunately swallowed meconium prior to coming out. Sadly his first experience of having anything in his mouth was a tube down his throat sucking out the meconium. So needless to say, when it came to breast feeding, he was having none of it. I felt bad for him and wished to help him work through his trauma but sadly he was unable to tell me how he really felt. I tried to breast feed but had to supplement. After bringing him home I supplemented him on breast milk and formula... My body was not producing anything... and he was not latching properly.

Funny enough, all of the above things they do not go over in the prenatal class... one of the many things I felt lied to about. I just remember the woman telling us that breast feeding is best and throw away the formula because if we use it once then we will remember how easy it was to formula feed with a bottle. Well, given my experience, breast was not best. Not only was he not latching, Nori was reacting poorly to my breast milk. I have no idea why.

So my beef here is not to tell you my sordid story about why I am not breast feeding - almost feeling like I need to justify my reasons to you. My beef here is to really question why people almost judge you for not doing... or at least that's my experience. I almost feel like I have to tell my whole story as to why I'm not breast feeding in order for people to understand or accept what choice I have made. The worst was the doctor. I told her I stopped and she tried to tell me how good it is for babies (like I did not know already) and asked many questions as to why I did not want to breast feed anymore and that breast is best crap. I just looked at her, answered her questions and said I was a formula fed baby and as far as I can tell, I was fine - physically anyway. Being adopted I did not really have a choice as to whether I was breast fed or not... formula was the only option. I felt that my doctor was trying to convince me, without actually saying it, that I was making a mistake and I needed to give it another try. I was not impressed.

Recently, I was at a restaurant and had Nori with me and this woman asked how old he was and he was about 5 weeks at the time and she said her niece just had a baby and was about 6 weeks old. She went on to say how great her niece was breast feeding, tough at first but she showed her how to do it and now it is going so great. My first thought was "who says that?" Of all the things to say, she tells me about her breast feeding niece. It was bizarre.

So here I am with a 6 week old baby that I am unable to breast feed due to circumstances out of my control... it is what it is and I refuse to let other women make me feel bad about it. This is just another experience telling me that we never know why people do what they do or what their circumstances are.

What The???

2010-07-01T12:39:00.001-07:00

I am still pregnant... still sick. yes, I am still sick. I do not, however throw up all the time... just every now and then. I am nauseous every singly day. I have to find out if I have GD (gestational diabetes) but I do get the joy of getting a shot in my butt because I am RH- and my husband is not. I am counting the days down for this.
My husband and I are having a boy. We have picked out a name, you can ask me if you want to know. I won't be posting it here. We have finally organized our 'office' to look a little more presentable for a baby. A family from church gave us a brand new crib. That was awesome and should save us about oh... 300$. We would have bought used anyway but it's at least 50$ we won't have to spend.
We have now moved on to strollers and car seats. Thankfully a friend has graciously given us a brand new car seat that her son has only used for like ten weeks because he grew out it! Talk about a tank of a kid. Haha. Strollers on the other hand are ridiculous. You can buy a stroller for everything. I was thinking about getting one of those red wagon - radio flyers and towing my baby around in that. Although, running with it may prove difficult and I could see the baby bouncing out. Now I've looked at websites describing different usages for strollers. It seems ridiculous to pay $600 for a stroller that you cannot use for the rest of your life. I wonder if the iPad has a stroller application. I would pay for the iPad to get the app. I just do not understand the reason why they have to be so bloody expensive. Even still, I want a website that I can go to where I can click on some options of what I would want the stroller to be and then the website generating some options for me. If you are aware of said website, please let me and the rest of the world know. With the price of strollers, I have expect them to have airbags, hydraulics or a USB connector for my iPod. Sadly, none have these options. So the online window shopping continues.

Preggers... Beware... brutal truth inside.

2010-04-12T10:37:00.000-07:00

Lots of people around me seem to be having babies. I figured if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. Dave and I are expecting our first child. We are due Sept 20th or somewhere in and around that date. I never trust the date the doctor gives because it's an estimated date. The only thing I know for sure is that there is only one baby.

So far there is nothing exciting about it. I will give you a minute to pick your jaw up off the keyboard and rid your mind of the negative thoughts you may now have about me. I am a realistic person who will tell you how I feel without sugar coating it. I also risk offending people but remember this is my opinion.

Most women get all teary and gushy over being pregnant and how excited they are. I am not one of these women. Oh wait, I do get teary... while I'm throwing up my wasted food. When I flush the toilet I think "well that was a waste of a bowl of cereal." I swear the baby is sitting there all nice and cushy on my bladder thinking... "I will take this and then punch you in the stomach and make you throw up the rest." I'm fairly used to the routine of getting up in the morning, eating something or drinking a big glass of water, brushing my teeth and then throwing up.

Half the days I feel like I have an eating disorder because I will brush my teeth knowing that as soon as I brush my tongue I will throw up. I purposely do this. Granted, it's because I feel naseaus and the only way to rid of it is to do that. I do not have the dedication to develop and maintain an eating disorder.

My 'girls' hurt more than I ever thought they could. Where is the justice in a big breasted person having more pain than a small breasted person... c'mon, I have more room for everything to settle.

There are some things you will never see posted on my blog or facebook profile... naked belly pictures, 4D ultrasound pictures, updated pregnancy pictures at different weeks so everyone can see how big I am getting, and baby pictures as soon as the baby is born and in my arms (c'mon I don't like how I look without makeup and I don't want others to see it either.) I think naked belly pictures are gross unless taken at the right time... preferrably not at 7-9 months because by then I will be as big as a house with nasty as stretch marks that I don't want to admit are there... granted I would hope my photographer knows how to use photoshop. I believe 4 D ultrasounds are creepy. I have heard people say that you can really see what the baby looks like but if my baby comes out looking like a half sculpted orange piece of playdo, I'm going to be a bit mad. The updated pregnancy pictures I would take and send only to my parents and family. It's not that I don't like them but I just don't want to do it.

Dave and I fully intend on finding out the sex of the baby. I know some people don't want to find out because they will be disappointed when the baby is born or it won't be as big of a surprise... really?? You won't be excited when your baby is born because you already know the sex. Okay Eeyore... "that's okay, I know it's a girl... I found out a few months ago..." I was surprised when I found out I was pregnant. Not because I couldn't get pregnant or that we were trying forever. I was surprised because I was pregnant in general. If you find out the sex and aren't excited when they are born, you may want to get you're head checked. I like to be in as much control as possible. So if finding out the sex allows me to go out and purchase items that are gender appropriate, I will. Plus, I don't want a bunch of clothes that are yellow, green and purple.

So that's my rant for the day/week/month about pregnancy. Don't get me wrong, I am excited but I'm telling you my experience. We find out the sex of the baby at the end of April. I intend on telling people the gender as well as the name we have chosen because what if someone else chooses the same thing...? Then I'd be copying them or them me...

Have to Get This Off My Chest

2009-07-17T14:10:00.000-07:00

Most of you know that my blog is really just a rant and rave. I do not generally update about the goings on in my life. I can if you want to but I find the other option more of an interesting read.

Below I have a list of apologies that I have come up with recently. Some are through my own experience (work mainly)and others are what I see going on for others. Some are related to people who cannot think outside of themselves. I am even sure some of you can relate to these.

I apologize for getting married and not hanging out with you the next day.
I apologize for allowing a family death to interfere with what was going on in your life.
I apologize for allowing my own health to interfere with your party.
I apologize for family staying over at the house and invading your space and needing somewhere to stay while they watched a loved one die.
I apologize that you are unable to be upset and angry with the people you should really be upset and angry with and are taking it out on me.
I apologize for my insensitivity through life and hope one day I can only be half the person you are and move past things as quick as you can.
I apologize that it took me too long to RSVP to your birthday.
I apologize for being busy and forgetting to do things. I know it must be hard to remember everything that needs to be done and never forget anything. I admire this quality the most about you.
I apologize for being honest. Next time I will beat around the bush and lie about how I feel.
I apologize for getting laid off work and finding it impossible to buy you a gift and wanting to save the embarassment of showing up to a party without one.
I apologize for not being a mind reader and knowing when you need help and support. As well as not being able to read your mind and understand exactly why you are angry.
I apologize for not finding you a doctor to get you medication for your borderline personality disorder.
I apologize for not being there for you enough. I will make an effort to call, text, and email everyday so I do not miss an opportunity to be supportive to you or offer help.
I apologize for not getting over things and I promise not to bring up things that have already been dealt with and be mad about it all over again.
I apologize for wanting to mend a friendship of over ten years now and not in two months when it seem convenient to you. I will leave my
I apologize for not thinking about you all day long and realizing the world revolves around you.
I apologize for how screwed up your life is and take full responsibility for your actions that caused it to be the way it is.

Wow... I feel better now that I have apologized to everyone. :)

Living Past 100

2009-03-25T09:34:00.000-07:00

For those of you who want to live past 100 years old, put your hand up. Me neither.
I was watching TV the other day and saw a clip for an upcoming Oprah show about defying age and living past 100. Apparently there is a diet that can help in this process.
My first thought/reaction to this was: why are people so afraid to let themselves age naturally? C'mon. Let your body do what it is supposed to do. This fountain of youth crap is dumb.

Most of this age defying life extension diet comes down to eating healthy. Wow, what a concept. Eating food that is good for you helps you live longer? I hope CNN is on top of this one. The other thing that these people do is calorie restriction. Honestly, I don't have the time to limit my caloric intake. I enjoy food and I enjoy eating good food. I'm not a hoarder when it comes to food and I eat what I know will be good for me. I drink Youth Juice to help me get my essential vitamins and nutrients everyday. Let's be honest, it is almost impossible to get all the servings of fruits and veggies you need in one day. I find I waste more than I actually consume. Since I started drinking the juice I have not been sick.

Aside from that, if I did make it to 100 years old I'd probably be moving slower than molasses in the winter or in a nursing home. Neither of which appeal to me in the least degree. I realized this morning that if I died tomorrow, I'd be okay with it. I'm sure I'd have a lot to answer to for when God judged me but I feel I lived a full life and am proud of my accoplishments. Don't get me wrong, I'm not looking to die tomorrow. I'd be happy to see retirement and travel a bit more.

I honestly try and live in such a way that if I did die tomorrow I would not have any regrets and feel good about the things I did for myself and others. I never want to walk away from life thinking "I wish I had ________."

I Love Technology

2009-03-13T11:26:00.000-07:00

Technology is every where you go and every day that passes there is something newer, faster, smaller, better.

My husband and I have a PVR - like a Tivo. We, or rather I, LOVE it! We can record whatever shows we want and watch them whenver. I love being able to fast forward through commercials because then I'm really not up for another hour watching something... I'm up for maybe 40-45 minutes.
There are two problems I have encountered with having a PVR:

First, the purpose of PVR, for me, is to record something and watch it when I am able or to record two shows at once. I stay up later watching a show I know I can watch tomorrow. I know the show will still be there tomorrow but on some level I suffer from FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) and need to know what happens right then. Somehow I justify staying up later by saying to myself that I would be staying up even later had I not recorded the show, at least I can ffwd through commercials. It's really stupid but that's what I do.

Second - I feel like I should be able to fast forward through everything and find myself looking for the fast forward button or actively thinking "I need to ffwd" before I realise not everything is capable of this. For example, the radio.

The other device I have that I absolutely love is my iTouch. I love the applications I can put on it and the fact that I don't need a button to push but I just touch the screen and it does what I want (for the most part). The problem is obvious. I touch screens other than my iTouch expecting the same outcome. My work cell phone doesn't even have a camera on it and I try to access settings by touching the small one inch screen. I have found myself at my computer making the motion to swipe or push an icon and then a voice says "hey moron, you can't do that..." Not yet anyway.

Phone Calls.

2009-02-18T13:22:00.001-08:00

A friend recently posted something on their blog related to phone calls in the middle of the night and why they are completely unnecessary. I have a bit of OCD when it comes to certain things in my life such as, making sure the car is locked even though I heard it beep I will press it at least two more times. I also double check and triple check my call forward number just in case I am forwarding my phone to the wrong number.
This second OCD habit is what my post is about. Years back I was having a telephone conversation with my mom when I got another call on the other line. It was some person with the wrong number and I politely told them, sorry you have the wrong number. They apologized and I went back to my mom. A few minutes later I received another call. I went over to the other line and this time it was a guy asking for the same girl. I told them again they had the wrong number. I told them what number they were calling and hung up.
I return to my conversation to my mom which had now changed to the morons who can't dial a number correctly. I get another call. This time, I kid you not, it's the operator. These people called the friggin' operator to make sure I had the right number. it was then that I suggested, "hmm, maybe their 'friend' forwarded their phone to the wrong number." I again told the operator my phone number. I went back to my mom and continued our conversation only to get another call on the other line. This time it was the 'owner' of the phone number calling. She told me she forwarded her phone accidentally to mine... "no kidding". She then asked me if I could tell her who called... almost like asking if she had any messages. I'm thinking "are you kidding me?" I told her I didn't know. She then asked what the guy sounded like. There are no words...

Blog Title

2009-02-07T08:33:00.001-08:00

My attempt to drum up some ideas for a blog title sort of flopped. I was hoping for something unique and somewhat crazy. I opted out of calling it something related to my last name because I work for child welfare and there are a lot of crazies out there and I'd prefer not to be that accessible on the internet.

Anyway, so my new blog title will be (drum roll please)... something uneventful and unexciting...

My Antics. I just came up with it now. Enjoy it.

Blog title

2009-01-12T14:29:00.000-08:00

So I am in need of a new blog title. I didn't like my last one and would like something catchy, funny, witty, etc... I need your help.
Please, comment and provide the best one you can come up. I will then post a new blog and have people vote. the one with the most votes wins. Any titles that are demeaning, derogatory, or offensive in any way, will not be included (you never know).

Death

2008-12-22T09:54:00.000-08:00

Have you ever noticed the way society talks about death or someone who has died. Obituaries do not state that John Doe died on such and such date; they say he passed on or is deceased. The best I have heard though is ‘expired’. I can't help but think “are we now like food that passes it’s expiration date?” I feel somehow this takes away from the beauty found in death and the reality in death. Yes, I did say beauty.
My husband’s step mother, Danna, died May 27, 2008. She was 50 at the time. She appeared to get rapidly sick but not sick with the flu. Her mood, speech, and some basic skills were declining. Like some doctors I have come across, he or she prescribed an anti depressant to fix Danna’s problem. Unfortunately they waited two to three weeks to see if there were any changes. Of course, there were no changes. It turned out she had a brain tumor. The location was not typical; it was located more in the brain rather than on top. They operated on the tumor and took out a good portion of it but in a matter of days it was back to the size it was prior to the surgery. She hung in there for a good ten days before she died. Danna had a huge and amazing family. She had 11 siblings and they all made it to her bedside to see her. All in one night they saw her. The most amazing and beautiful thing I saw in those moments was the love between them. Danna’s mother, Ruth, came up to the hospital from three hours away. Ruth hugged her and Danna stroked Ruth’s hair. Danna could not speak but she had amazing facial expressions that spoke more than words itself. As Ruth pulled away and started to turn her back towards Danna, in such a childlike manner and in a way in which only a child could to their mother, Danna reached for her mother with the saddest torn frown on her face. This moment was so beautiful to me. It showed me that although death can be dark and hurtful, there is a beauty to be found there. The look on Danna’s face spoke words that were different for each person seeing this scene. To me, her face said “mom I have an owie, I need a hug; don't leave yet.”
The night before Danna died I opted to go home and sleep while Dave waited in the hospital with his Dad. That same night, Dave’s brother’s wife went into labor. Kieran was born at 2:00 in the morning and Danna died at 7:00. What an array of emotions to feel in one day. We were deeply saddened by the loss of an amazing and wonderful woman but yet happy because a new spirit had been brought into the world. Part of me felt guilty for being happy for the new addition because I knew how emotionally fragile our father was.
Death is out of our control. Death is inevitable. Death is not the end but merely a beginning into something more. What that more is, you decide before you die.

Love It or Hate It

2008-09-20T14:24:00.000-07:00

I was recently reading my friend's blog about an episode on the Oprah show regarding internet predators. My friend was upset because Oprah was reading a document that internet predators want kids to read. A sort of How -To book apparently. The comments to this blog were about how disgusted they were that Oprah would read something like that to the world because it is letting people know how to go about doing disgusting things to children. I have not seen this episode but have read about it online.

Let's be honest, people do not need a how to book... that's what pornography does. It's looking at pictures not reading detailed information on how to do these things.

My opinion of this is not shared by my friend or the comments others have made. I am not disgusted by Oprah or what she presents on her show. I commend her for taking such an intense and somewhat disgusting topic and bringing it to light. People are aware of the predators lurking on the internet but I really feel they don't really get what they are capable of doing. In her own mind I feel that Oprah thinks it is her job to bring these things to light. Kudos to her because let's be honest, no one else appears to be willing to do it to the degree she does.

We have become in some way accustomed to censorship and that people get outraged when the news shows a dead person who may happen to have wet blood on them or they are not completely covered up... why is there outrage in this but not outrage when it comes to child abuse, domestic violence, etc??? Why is this okay? C'mon. There should be more outrage about the acts of violence and disgust that are happening in the world than towards the people who are bringing it to light.

I work in an industry where I am confronted by violence, abuse, incest on a daily basis. It's disgusting but someone has to do it and someone has to be the voice of those who do not have one. Oprah is the voice of those people who are victims. She is also making a lot of predators angry for making 'normal' people aware of how to do these things. They don't want others knowing... just their 'crowd'.

Kudos to Oprah and the other nameless people who want to make this world better by bringing the harder things to light. Think about how little you would know about these topics if Oprah wasn't bringing them to light. Personally, I like watching those shows because I am more educated about the topic and I can better prepare my children. I cannot let my children live in a bubble and not know what is happening. Things happen that we have no control over (outside AND inside the confines of a family).

Insults

2008-09-04T21:20:00.000-07:00

I have been insulted many times in my life. It comes with the territory of being a social worker and child protection worker. I'm used to it. It is very different however when it comes from a video game.

We recently bought a Wii Fit. I love the Wii but was leery of this game until I tried it at a friend's house. I loved it. So there I was doing my strength training, pushups to be exact and let's be honest, I can't do the 'real' pushups. I do the girly ones. While I was doing them my 'personal trainer' tells me "I can see you aren't very strong". All I could say was "excuse me, you don't know me." Then I hear my husband laughing in the background.

I haven't done the pushups since.

still intact

2008-07-23T15:16:00.000-07:00

I was going to finish the previous blog with an update but I'm not ready to go there just yet. So instead I will tell you about my slo-pitch experience from last week.
Dave and I joined a slo pitch league in the spring and continued it through the summer. We have really enjoyed it. I bought cleats, a bat and a bright new ball. Last week we were playing amazing and were finally winning one. I was up to bat and I wanted to place my hit between 1st and 2nd basemen because there was a gap and I am just that good. I hit it that direction but it was slightly short. It went straight towards the 1st basemen. Well she ran up to it and then started running towards me down the baseline. So I ran around her and had her beat. Keep in mind, I have lightening speed. When I went around her I either twisted my ankle and tripped over my other foot or I just learned how to run and tripped over my foot as I turned towards 1st base.
Picture it... me running full speed tripping. As I was falling I think I put my hands down but as I landed I still had momentum and kept skidding forward on my face using my chin as the brakes. Apparently when I fell on my face my legs came up and almost over my head (liken it to a scorpion tail). I think that was the amazing part of it. According to Dave and other teamates they could not comprehend how I did it and how I was not in more pain. As I lay on the ground people were asking if I was okay. The only thing I said as a turned my head was "I just want you to know, I am not crying." And I didn't cry... of course I wanted to but I was not going to be that person (or girl for that matter) no matter how much my face, elbow, knee, ankle and pride hurt. Forget it.
Next time that happens, I am going to run right over who is in my way. Or at least attempt to given my size.

On My Mind...

2008-05-11T20:31:00.000-07:00

I have been told I needed to write on my blog more frequently. So, this is the start of my attempt to do just that. I have had a lot go on in the last month or even in the past weekend but have a hard time articulating exactly what I want to say.
In the past month a friend's brother has died. He was 25 years old. That was hard because it was a friend and it seemed to be sudden and he was my husband's age. He was married 7 months. From what I gather from the funeral and what I already knew, he was pretty incredible. There is the sadness at the loss of a great person but my sadness was for the people left behind and the emotions they feel as a result of not seeing their brother, husband, son, or friend for a while. I also can't help but think, Dave one day will die. I just hope it's not sooner than what I want.
Seeing death and feeling its affects changes a person. I have found a dead body and I can probably say I have saved a person’s life. There is something remarkable in seeing someone who has already died and someone who is about to. Some people recognize it is their time and others force their way in when their time is not up. Regardless of the circumstances in how they left, there is always an expectation that person is coming home tomorrow.
I believe that things come in threes. Currently, I am waiting for number 3.
Number 1. Friday night Dave and I found out his step mom has a tumor in her brain. At this point nobody knows if it is benign or malignent. Regardless, things like this somehow happens to other people... not you or someone close to you. The first thing I thought was about the recent Grey's Anatomy episodes. All that comes to my mind is that God is in control and she is in God's hands.
Number 2. Last night my brother was in a pretty bad car wreck. According to one person, he is lucky to be alive. He dislocated his hip, shattered his knee cap, had glass stuck in his face, and was unconscious for 2 hours. The fire department had to cut him out of the vehicle. He will be okay though... just really sore and in pain for a bit.
I have to say that I don't mind being reminded how fragile life is and how uninvicible I am. I just wish the message came in different ways. I can sit here and say life is short but really, my life is as long and as full as I make it.

Listening To Music While Driving

2008-04-16T09:13:00.000-07:00

Does anyone else have a problem with someone listening to their iPod while driving their vehicle?? Both earphones in...

Earth hour!!! Sorry... Earth what??

2008-04-03T15:00:00.000-07:00

March 29, 2008 marked a international event: Earth Hour. Earth hour started originally in Sydney Australia in 2007. They thougth it would be a good idea to make the event international because of the success it had. Essentially what happens is that cities, towns, etc will turn off their power for one hour . From this people will realise how much energy they save and how that will save the earth from a downward spiral to hell.

When I first heard this I thought "what a fantastic idea!" Little did I know at the time how ridiculous it really is. I thought this for a few different reasons...

First: some businesses, in Calgary anyway, were using it as a way to make money. Come and rent a room at a hotel for an hour and not use electricity! All for the low price of 169$! Why not just stay home in the dark. Although it is a great way to spend 169$... I cannot think of a better way to spend that money.

Second: one news broadcasting company said "and we're participating by turning off all non essential lights in our stations across Canada"... my first thought was: if they are so non essential why bother having them in the first place?

Third: the city announced they too were turning off non essential lights. My statement above is not needed here. Apparently the non essential lights they turned off were on road ways that were high collision areas. Thanks for saving the earth but not lives!

Four: what is non essential lighting really?? Like I said before, if it is non essential get rid of it altogether. Why do downtown city buildings need all the lights on? I am sure a few would suffice and still provide a nice skyline to look at.

Don't get me wrong, the concept of Earth Hour is great. I like the idea. I think it is important for people to realise what things they do have and what they could possibly lose. After coming back from Nicaragua I have found ways to not use as much water. If it's yellow let it mellow... if it's brown flush it down. Not only does this conserve water it also saves you money. Energy works the same way... unplug things you are not using because they are still using energy and costing you money.

My husband and I participated in Earth Hour as best as we could. We unplugged most things and lit candles. We did, however, have to watch the hockey game. So did thousands of others in Calgary. This would explain why Calgary did not decrease their use of energy but in fact went up by 10%. Which 'they' blame on colder temperatures.

Granted Canada apparently had the highest participation rate... Oh canada!

2008-03-23T22:51:00.000-07:00

I made this video to give you a better understanding of Project Nicaragua and why we love to go there! Pictures say a thousand words. I hope you enjoy it!

Sigh

2008-02-26T18:44:00.000-08:00

I went to Nicaragua recently. I do not wish to talk about the events of the trip in this blog necessarily but rather what I learned and hope to continue to take with me through out my life.
First, we in the first world countries have it made. We have the luxury of knowing that when we turn on our tap water will come out every time. Most have the luxury of knowing that when we turn on a switch light illuminates that space. I went to Nicaragua last year and came home thinking and hoping that I would be more conservative with the water I used. This time I come back thinking the same thing hoping that it actually sticks.
I sit here and I think of the poverty that I have witnessed in Nicaragua. In Granada, barefoot children wearing dirty torn clothing would come up to us wanting money and probably food. Their barefoot mother was not far behind carrying a baby on her hip. I then think of the children in the countryside who had absolutely no access to clean water, their houses were made of sheet metal roofs and wood that barely made their walls. Their wells were often dried up and the women have to hike a long way to get water. The water was never clean and safe for us to drink therefore making it unhealthy for them to drink. These children who we think are impoverished and somehow without are the happiest children. We were not there to pull them out of their poverty and somehow make them rich. We were merely there to improve their physical health. I do not shed tears just for the children who were begging from us but also the handicapped boy who laughed and smiled with us as we walked through their community in the country. I cry about their happiness and their humility. I cry because I have so much to learn.

A Good Mouse is a Dead Mouse

2008-01-24T07:43:00.000-08:00

I have recently, and by recently I mean before Christmas, had my apartment invaded by mice. picture this, laying in bed almost asleep and you hear this scratching sound in the wall... yes IN the wall. Well, I heard this sound and I shot straight up out of bed kind of like when a coffin opens and the body springs up. I turned to my husband and yelled 'there are mice, I can hear them!!!" (To get the full effect of that sound, scratch your nails against the wall). Keep in mind, he was dead asleep so he's probably has no idea what is going on. So he says "what?" I repeat myself again and add "I cannot sleep in here knowing that they are in here too! I can hear them scratching in the walls". I was mad and it came across like I was mad at him because somehow it was his fault the mice were there. So, my loving husband says "what am I supposed to do?" I just wanted them gone... I didn't care how he did it. by no means was this conversation rational (on my part). So he gets up and goes to our cupboard and gets bounce sheets and puts them in the heat vent. Apparently they really dislike this smell. Is this true? I have no idea. All I know is that it was a placebo for me. In my mind it worked and I was happy. Even if in the real world it did not work... I did not want to read it or hear about it because for me on that dark night... it did work.
The sage continues...
Just after December 1 I was at home sick and I thought to myself... I'm going to put up the Christmas decorations. I went to the storage room and pulled out the big bin and saw it. I saw mouse crap all over the floor in one corner. I suprisingly did not flip out I just continued on my way of decorating. I did call Dave to tell him about the mice crapping all over the floor. Oh did I forget to mention that they chewed through the plastic baseboard?? Ya, that's even creepier. Dave's idea was to get mothballs and shove them in the holes and put plywood in front of the hole. We went searching for mothballs to discover that nobody sells them. Please, if you know where to get them, let me know. I will drive any distance!
Dave and I decided that we needed to clean out our storage room. And when I say 'we' I mean Dave. I was not about to go in there and touch anything. He's the man, it's his job right?? So Dave was cleaning it out and discovered that they defecated all over a quilt his grandma made him. I told him to get rid of it because you never know what could be left even if you do clean it. He was not happy. After he pulled everything out he threw the mouse trap out. He basically decided that the mice were mocking us by crapping on top of it and around it. Plus, the mice had chewed through ever corner in that room. CREEPY!!!
We bought poison and the poison was probably 1 inch by 1 inch... thick. It smelled good too... odd I know. But seriously it did. So I cut some of the poison up and shoved it in the holes. Some of the holes were too small so I would just leave the whole block in the corner. I would discover a day or two later that they were nibbling on it. I was ecstatic about this up until Dave went in five minutes later to notice that the whole block was gone. Do these mice have stomach's of steel?? honestly! I just hope they take it to their leader!!
On New Years Day morning Dave was in the kitchen preparing to make homemade pancakes (my little homemaker)... he pulled out the pan from the oven drawer and discovered mice crap on that. He pulled everything out and the mice had been all over. What's worse is they crapped in every muffin tin hole. They were mocking us. It was almost like they were saying "oh you gave my brother poison, well I'm going to leave you a present to remember me by."
The mice I think are gone or at least that is what I am telling myself to give me peace of mind.
Even though this story is creepy and disgusting, nothing will be as disgusting as the time I killed a mouse by stepping on it.

Remember the ripples.

2008-01-10T20:47:00.000-08:00

I have typed and retyped this email so many times... I start on one rant and then move to another only to move back to the first rant.
I think my rant is mostly to do with how stupid some people can be. Stupid may be a harsh word, especially if one of those 'stupid' people happen to be reading this blog. Although most stupid people don't even know they are stupid (reminds me of The Sixth Sense)... think about it.

Why do I think people are stupid you ask? Well, some people really don't understand how the actions they take are a drop in a pond. The ripple goes on forever.
I can admit that I have made stupid decisions but I have never done anything serious enough to cause regret. I never like to say I regret things. I find that when you are in deep regret about something you tend to overlook the things that you should learn from those experiences. Hence, why I never regret anything.
I believe, like you probably do, that there is something to learn from everything. For a long time I would focus on what has happened in the past, not in regret, but more mulling over it... intensely. I liken this experience to driving a car. While we drive we look in our rearview mirror to see what is behind us. When we drive we focus more on what is ahead of us because if we do not, we crash. So when I would focus so much on my past I was missing what is in front and I would crash and burn (not literally).
I notice sometimes while I am driving that I will glance in my rearview and notice a car behind me and then I will turn my focus on what is ahead. It will take me a while before I look back again and when I do, I realise the car that was there is gone and I panic a bit, wondering where it went. I know in driving it is important to pay attention to everything on the road: ahead, behind and to the sides. But I do not focus so much on one that I do not see other things on the road.
Life is a road... we must not focus so much on what is behind that we lose sight of where we are going. We also must not focus so much on what is ahead that we forget where and what we came from.
I started out by talking about stupid people and I was going to rant on about stupid decisions people have made. I do not wish to rant about that. I do not wish to focus so much on the destination but experience the journey... but most of all, I wish for the world to remember the ripples...

New Year Resolutions...

2008-01-02T16:26:00.000-08:00

Is it New Years Resolutions or new year's resolution or new year resolutions... the latter makes more sense to me but I could be wrong and I probably am.
2007 has come and gone and I ran in 2008 with a nice burn on my hand. I hope this is not an omen of things to come.
I thought about making resolutions for the new year but they generally are broken two days into the year. Although, I think the wording of the resolution makes a difference... for example, I will do this more and I won't do that... chances are you won't do that and you will end up doing the other. Why set yourself up for failure like that? Life is unpredictable. I would love to make a resolution that said I will not swear but c'mon... have you ever driven a car or played a competitive game (video, sport, etc)?? But in my effort to not make new year resolutions... I have already made one.
All one can really hope for in the coming year or years is that they are a better person than the previous year. I think that is a respectable goal... or resolution... or whatever.

A Spin on Dating

2007-12-03T12:03:00.001-08:00

Hanging out with other couples (married or not) is like dating. Some couples you click with and others you just don't.
Dave and I had dinner at another couple's house and I knew before going in their home that we wouldn't click. I knew the relationship was over before it had started. We just had nothing in common. It was the first time we had hung out and we went through the niceties of "where do you work? where did you serve your mission? etc" But after that is gone we had to find different commonalities or interests. This couple did not have cable which meant that they did not watch television. Generally speaking, conversations seem to always revolve on what happened on Grey's, Survivor, or whatever the flavor of the month is. So, the television conversation piece was abruptly thrown out the window and the next thing you talk about is the weather. One can only say "oh ya, it is cold out eh?" so many times before it gets old. Some couples are board game fanatics; our date was not. Needless to say, we left their house with Dave saying "ya, we'll have to have you over for dinner to our place sometime." Knowing full well that this probably won't happen. It's not that I hate this couple or even slightly dislike them, it's just that we did not click. Plus, I think we would corrupt them with all the movies and video games and systems we had.
After the first date, the next stage is the awkwardness of having polite conversation with them because honestly, how do you break up with them. It's not like when you were dating and you could just say "it's not you it's me" or "I just don't see this working out"... And then, what do you do when they invite you over again, to pretend your busy or tell them you are seeing another couple?? It just doesn't work that way. It's worse when you are married because the other couple may still anticipate a relationship of sorts but you can never really tell them it's over.

Fly birdy fly

2007-11-27T12:30:00.000-08:00

Well, winter has finally fallen upon us here in Calgary. Winter actually fell a few days ago when it snowed a bit and the temperature was below zero. Even though it may have snowed a few days ago, I take my cue from the birds.
Birds generally form their beautiful V shape and fly south for the winter. On this particular day last week I noticed there was an abnormal amount of birds in the sky. I felt as though I was in Hitchcock's The Birds. I love my drive home because I get to look at the city centre and the snowcapped mountains that serve as it's back drop. I was completely distracted by the birds. I was distracted by them because of the beautiful chaos. Beautiful because of the way nature works. Chaos because I don't think they had a clue where they were going. Birds were flying in every direction. Picture a pregnant woman with her husband and kids at home. The woman's water breaks... dad starts to panic... grabs whatever is close by and runs out the door. On his way out he realizes he needs his wife and should probably take the kids because they are too small to stay at home. Needless to say he runs back in the house grabs them and then dashes again out the door. The birds that day were no different. I think they forgot that winter was a season.
So the birds finally arrive in the south. they are safe and they are sound but their little bird hearts are racing faster than a cheetah. They then make a resolution to be more prepared for next winter. Let's face it, people and birds are very similar... both deny winter for as long as they possibly can.

Are people really THAT dishonest??

2007-11-23T09:32:00.001-08:00

Generally I try not to rant on my blog but I figure it is entertaining for you and cathartic to me. Plus, people tend to give me reasons to rant.
When I was working at the elustrious shelter I used to park my car in the underground parkade (for staff only). One day as I was gracefully leaving work I thought to myself "I wonder if someone would leave a note on my car if they scratched it with their car door?" The answer came about thirty seconds later and became extremely ironic. Someone did in fact scratch and dent the door and did not leave a note. I knew who was parked beside me and asked him if he hit my car door and surprisingly said no. What a surprise. I then asked the other person who was parked there in the morning and surprsingly she had the same answer. Both stated that they would leave a note had they done something like this. My next thought: You are so going to hell for lying to me right now.
C'mon people, you KNOW when you hit someone's door with yours. You KNOW because you check to see if you left a scratch or a mark... You KNOW because that you use your thumb or finger to wipe away the evidence or to see if there is a scratch...
Case in point: a person (name withheld for insurance reasons) drives into a parking lot at the mall and the passenger (name witheld for insurance reasons) opens their door and hits the one beside them. The passenger looks at the driver and says "Um, yeah, we can't park here. We need to move." Granted there was no damage but still... there was the knowledge of hitting and the checking... hmmm.
I digress. At work the other day I came out to the parking lot (not underground and any tom DICK and harry can park there) and noticed a nice three part scratch on the door. Seriously?! How stupid can you be to hit the car not only once but twice and wait... three times? I guess people are that stupid. And they didn't leave a note.
I'm not here to get money from people it is the principle of the matter. I would not call their insurance company. I would thank them for their honesty (if they leave their number) and leave it at that because it's just a car. I just wish people would be more honest.
As I sit here and rant about this I am sure you are wondring if I would leave a note. The answer is no I wouldn't because I wouldn't hit someone's door with mine.

Monkey Business

2007-11-09T09:00:00.000-08:00

Dave and I recently went to Utah for Canadian Thanksgiving. Who in their right mind goes to another country to celebrate their own country's holiday? Well, we do. Actually we went to a church conference and visited with friends whom I haven't seen in a few years and whom Dave had never met. We stayed with a friend Janaya and her husband Burton. We were driving home one night and monkeys came up. Janaya proceeded to tell us that human beings are so obsessed with monkeys (or any primate) that you cannot go for one day without hearing about or seeing something to do with monkeys. Since that day, Dave and I have seen and or heard about a monkey or something related to a monkey every single day.
I challenge you here and now to look for or hear about the not so elusive monkey. It's kind of crazy that you cannot do the same thing with man's best friend.

True story

2007-10-17T15:32:00.000-07:00

I recently started my new job and let me tell you, it is fantastic. I have only been there a week but I really love it.
When starting a new job, one likes to make good first impressions... which I have done. The impression that one does not want to give off is that of a lazy loaf or someone who can't remember to do things. Well, I went to work this morning and met a co-worker at the court house. No, I am not in trouble. Even before I could really go into the main part of the building I needed to go through security. This is very similar to airport security only I did not have to remove my shoes or take off my belt (not that I was wearing one). So I took my bag and my long jean jacket coat and put it in the plastic bin. I walked through the metal detector, and of course it beeped but the guard just told me to go through. I thought this was odd. I grabbed my bag put on my jacket and proceeded to the courtroom. We got back to the office around 1145am which gave me enough time to get a few things done before lunch. After lunch I went back to my office where I discovered, I forgot to put on my bra. Seriously... I forgot. I am really not sure how that happened but it did. I wanted to call someone and tell them but didn't know who to phone. I wanted to tell someone in the office, mainly because I thought it was the funniest thing EVER but I refrained for fear of looking like a complete moron. I am sure you are wondering how I went through the day without anyone saying anything or even myself noticing. It was a good day to wear a short skirt and a LOOOOONG jacket (don't worry, other clothes were in place). I never took the jacket off all day except when I went through Security (which explains him telling me to go on through... he could probably tell I wasn't wearing a bra)!!! Without my jacket on it was somewhat noticeable that I was not wearing a bra (I checked in the bathroom later). If I were fifty then it would have been a very noticeable problem down around my waist. After I realized that I am moron I walked around with my arms crossed so nobody could really tell or wonder. Moral of the story, breast examinations are good to do!

This is for all people everywhere

2007-09-27T12:42:00.001-07:00

So I have this best guy friend that we will call John Doe. We have been best friends since our first year of college back in 2001 or 2002. We have travelled overseas together, go for lunch all the time, pay one another do homework etc. We were really good friends.
My friend John got married a few years ago. I have met his wife a few times and we have hung out. She is a very sweet girl. Myself, I have been married for just over a year. My best friend came to my wedding reception with his wife and parents.
So when I call him the other day and talk to him for about five to ten minutes about nothing and inquiring when the four of us could get together, it was a shock when he called me back to say not to call him or email him again by the request of his wife... I was shocked. My husband was shocked. I had to ask John if he was kidding... to which he replied he was not. I felt a plethora of emotions. I was sad because I am losing a great friend and even more sad because he is stuck in a relationship that is controlling like that. It was one of those moments where I wanted to tell him to call me when the relationship ended. I would never do that because I would never wish that kind of torment upon anyone. As a result, I figured I will let his wife get over her insecurities and they can work through their marriage and hopefully then he will call me. I just hope he does not regret some of the decisions and sacrifices he has had to make.
Did I forget to mention that I am a very happily married woman who would never in any way jeopardize that relationship. If I got together with anyone else, it would be a step backwards. Sorry guys. I married the best and would never settle for less.
This is not the first time this has happened to me. I have had two other guy friends do this very same thing to me. My reaction: jaw drop and an "are you kidding me?" response. I do not have any sort of gay tendencies but let me just say this... all these women are hot. C'mon people!!!

If I were walking down the road with any one of these women most guys would look at her and think: dang she's hot... and then see me and have a pondered look on their face that says "I wonder if she's gay".... I do not consider myself to be a model or even 'hot' but I am comfortable with who I am. Women who read this... pull yourselves together and get your heads out of the sand. If you are in a relationship with someone, remember, he chose you. This also includes men. Jealousy is attractive for about two seconds and then it gets old. The more you try to control someone the more they will want to do the opposite.

Jerry Maguire Moment

2007-09-18T19:01:00.001-07:00

Today was my last day of work. I had worked at the shelter for about 5.5 years. I have gained a lot of skills and abilities that I will take with me into the next chapter of my life. I have also gained a lot of funny stories... to which I will share at another time.
There is something somewhat empowering in handing in one's resignation notice and basically stickin' it to the man... when I handed in my notice I left work feeling happy. I was listening to my iPod wanting that Jerry Maguire moment where I skip the songs looking for that perfect song that makes me scream at the top of my lungs... this did not happen. I did however listen to U2's Stuck in a Moment which is somewhat symbolic of the job itself but not very empowering.
My co-workers, bless their hearts, threw me a going away get together for my last few hours of work. It was nice to say goodbye to people, in all honesty, that I may never see again. That's the wierd thing about jobs... you make great relationships with co-workers and then you leave them or they leave you with the 'ya I'll call you for lunch sometime' adage knowing full well that this will probably not happen.
I did not have a box of stuff that one assumes one would have when clearing out their office... instead I had a Safeway bag to my belongings in... oatmeal packages that i would eat for breakfast, pen holder, insignificant papers, etc. The ironic part is that when clients leave the shelter they always take their stuff in plastic bags... it made me laugh that I was doing the same. I handed in my keys and as I walked with my big bag of stuff, my water bottle, jacket, and purse I thought I am missing something... my work keys. I felt naked without them.
I got in my car and switched the station and listened to Natasha Beddingfield's Unwritten.... it was my Jerry Maguire moment. It was the end of the song but who cares... it was my moment.

A few things...

2007-08-09T12:09:00.000-07:00

Top 3 Worst Inventions/ideas:

1. Auto-flush toilets... if you are female you will understand this complaint. I hate them because it seems that every time I use them they go off too soon. Then I find myself scrambling trying not to get sucked in or sprayed on. If I wanted a boudet, I would have asked for one.

2. Hand dryers... It is more effective if I just blow on them myself.

3. The first five rows at the movie theatre. I just experienced this for the first time last night. Let me tell you, it sucked! The movie was alright but I had to move my head (not just my eyes) from one end of the screen to the other. IF there was something going on on the left side, I wouldn't know because I was paying attention to the right side. Those first five rows should be banished!

Top 3 Best Inventions

1. Sliced Bread... c'mon you know it is and you know I had to say it.

2. The internet... although it has it's evil points the good far outweigh the bad... online banking, wikipedia, email, (not facebook), etc.

3. the wheel... think about how many things operate using a wheel (bikes, rollerblades, cars, airplanes (obviously not when they are flying in the sky))... modes of transportation use the wheel... if we didn't have one we'd still be walking.

New vs Old

2007-06-18T18:22:00.000-07:00

We have recently acquired a brand new 2007 Nissan Versa. Color: blueberry (with a capital B). It is a sweet ride. It has so many cool features. My favorite being the handsfree Bluetooth. It allows me to call and speak to someone without actually talking into a phone. Their voice comes through the 6 speakers and subwoofer. It's awesome! Plus, I can actually drive this car. The old car was a standard and I do not know how to drive it. Frankly, I did not care to learn on it. I knew we would be getting a new car that was automotic (cheaper on gas for city driving).

Now you may be asking "what were you driving before Alisha?" Well let me tell you..
There are crappy cars and then there are really crappy cars. Case in point: our 1989 Ford Mustang. I actually should not be saying 'ours' because I had and did not want any ownership of said vehicle. This car in no way shape or form can be mistaken for a 'muscle' car. Let me begin by stating that Ford circles their problem: Now Dave bought his 'stang from our friend's dad for $600. This guy sold it to him thinking that he made a deal and that he may have potentially ripped off some unsuspecting 'kid'. Little did he know that two years later the damn thing would still be running.

Why am I mocking this car you ask? Well let us list... yes list... off the problems with this vehicle. Where do I begin? Let's start with the door handle on the passenger side. It takes a magician to open it. It takes a certain amount of skill in hand movement and position. If you do not get it just right it will not open and you're left looking the fool because you are not smarter than the car door.

The window... well let's just say when it rains I feel it. The seal is completely gone and the water leaks through the window and soaks the seat and the person sitting in that seat.. namely Me.

Exibit A: the stains on the seat. Please remember that these stains were from actualy rain water and not from some freak 'accident' that I had. Notice the dark marks... no it is not some cool camera feature.. it is water stainage.

As we continue to move on, we no longer have beta. We have managed to acquire a car with a CD player... a six disc player at that.
I have to say that the best features are found on the exterior. Dave kept telling me that the one headlight will always short out no matter what. To which he stated that the headlight was broken.

Exibit B: now you may be wondering what the odd discoloration is in the headlight and why it is two toned. Do not be mistaken my friends.. two toned headlights are not an extra feature on the 1989 ford Mustang... or any car for that matter. It is indeed water.

We could probably replace the bulb but as soon as it rained we would be without one head light. Plus, when driving this car at night Dave had to use his highbeam (yes only one highbeam for the one working light). I should mention that here in Alberta... the wonderfully rich oil free province that we are, it is a $115 fine for having a burnt out headlight... yes I did say $115. How do I know this? We got one. The only problem was that once we paid that fine we couldn't afford to buy a freakin' bulb.

Next, let's move to the high quality paint job on this 'stang. The paint as you can tell is a nice blue color. Exibit C: The paint job. Be aware that that is NOT water down the middle of the car. That is indeed the finish.. peeling away with every storm or whenever I peeled it off. Some enjoyment is found in doing this. It is similar to peeling off a sunburn.

There is more. the emergency break is broken and therefore always has the bright red indicator light on reading "BRAKE". The car's bumper is also tied on using zip ties. Yes, I did say zip ties. Oddly, it happens to work really well.

I am sure there is more to say but I believe that is all I've got to say about the car other than you can see the road through the base of the driver's side door when it is shut. It is definately the feature that really makes me feel safe and comfortable.

Needless to say: new car good, old car sold to some poor sucker for $100. I told Dave to try and get $200 but I fear that may be pushing it.

Facebook...

2007-05-08T16:19:00.000-07:00

The whole world seems to be gravitating to this phenomenon of facebook. At first I was completely opposed to it mainly because almost everyone I went to Nicaragua with was in love with this webpage. Ironically when I came home from that trip I discovered that I had an invite and joined without hesitation... so much for my convictions of never joining the silly group.
Once you sign on to this website you will find yourself checking your email every ten mintues to see if someone has sent you a message or if someone has invited you to be their friend. Some of these people who invite you to be their friend have not seen or spoken to you in about 20 years. No joke. I found my neighbour from about 20 years ago... how did I find him??? I stalked him out and searched... *sigh* When one does not receive an invitation to be another's friend suden disappointment sinks in and leaves the person thinking they have no friends at all. To date I have almost 200... my goal is 500.
Five minutes after I checked my email the other day I checked it again and discovered that someone had invited me to be their friend. I almost fell off my chair because of laughter and complete shock. This reaction came from the fact that this person who invited me to be their 'friend' is the same person who wanted and tried to beat me up in school on more then one occassion... needless to say I accepted her friendship...

Becoming A Girl

2007-04-14T21:40:00.000-07:00

I was at a friend's bridal shower a few weeks back when my friend (and hairdresser) told me that her salon was shaving heads for cancer. I said I would do it. It was a sort of half hearted comittment. Then I got more information and sent out an email announcing the event. At which point I realised there was no turning back.
The picture to your left shows my luscious locks prior to the shearing.

There are benefits of having hair that long or longish hair in general. One being that most people will assume that you are not a lesbian.

I was on the bus going to my 'appointment' to shave my head and I was angry with my hair. Let me tell you why I hate(d) my hair. First, my hair had this wonderful talent of tangling itself. I know you are thinking that most people with long hair have the same problem. Mine is different. After brushing my hair I swear my strands of hair decide to have a party and make a big nest. The only way to really untangle the mess is by ripping out the rats nest that has occured. I am surprised I was not bald before shaving it off. Second problem with long hair: static. Mabey it is just the subarctic temperatures and desert dryness that causes it but my hair had a mind of its own and would try and get away from me.

So the act of shaving my head was not really that big of a deal. I was completely fine with having no hair. I now have other problems to deal with. I am not your average makeup wearing gussy myself up everyday kind of girl. As the first picture above will tell. Who would want to get all gussied up to work at a homeless shelter?? I know what you are thinking... "wow she pulls off hotness really well". That is a talent God has blessed me with... now I have to work a bit harder for the hotness, we are all given challenges in life and this is mine. I realised that I will have to put on at least mascara and possibly some earrings so people will be able to tell I am a girl. Even that does not stop people from questioning my sex, guys wear makeup all the time... eyeliner and mascara and some of them look really good. So I am resorting to dressing like a tramp, tight clothes and all. I do love having no hair because it saves money on hair product and shampoo. Plus I can take a shower 5 mintues before going to bed and not have to wait until my hair is dry. Now I just need to figure out what to do with the 200$ hair straightener I bought 4 months ago...

The Soundtrack of My Life...

2007-04-12T21:36:00.001-07:00

If my life was a movie, what would my soundtrack be?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your music library
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool.

Opening Credits: Steal My Kisses by Ben Harper
Waking Up: My Immortal by Evanescence (this is sad to wake up to)
First Day At School: Last Night by The Strokes (haha... this should be for waking up)
In Love: How to Save a Life By The Fray (I LOVE THIS SONG!!!)
Fight Song: Sooner or Later by Switchfoot
Breaking Up: See The Sun by Pete Murray
Prom: Cream by Prince
Life's OK: Wherever you Will Go by The Calling (can anyone say stalker??)
Mental Breakdown: Light Shine Down by Collective Soul
Driving: Love My way by The Psychadelic Furs (I was really hoping for ACDC Highway to Hell)
Flashback: High Rolling by Beautiful Girls
Getting Back Together: So This is Christmas by John Lennon (I do not know what to say to that)
Birth of Child: Landslide by Smashing Pumpkins (appropriate???)
Wedding: Man! I feel LIke a Woman by Shania Twain (haha)
Final Battle: Jem and The Holograms Theme Song... I kid you not!
Death Scene: My Way or the Highway by Limp Bizkit
Funeral Song: I Want to Break Free by Queen (this is wicked! Totally my funeral Song!!!)
End Credits: Heart of Gold by Neil Young

My stay at the hospital

2007-03-23T12:50:00.000-07:00

Last weekend I went snowshoeing and it is normally a lot of fun... when you are not sick. I woke up Saturday morning feeling like poop but I went snowshoeing anyways. As we were shoeing I was completely exhausted and felt like just lying in the snow and having a nap. I also realised that if I did that I would probably freeze to death. I am sure my friends would not allow that to happen... I think.
When I got home from this excursion I went straight to bed and tried to sleep off my sickness. At about... really late o'clock I had severe abdomen pain and needed to go to the hospital. I went to one and because they take all the gang bangers and drug lords there I was going to have to wait about 9 hours. I almost resorted to stabbing myself with something in order to get a bed quicker... Dave would not let me do that and he took me to the other hospital. We waited for about a half hour and then I was sleeping in a bed with my new best friend Morphine. Her and I get along quite well. She came by my room at least 4 times through the night.
The doctor thought I may have something wrong with my gall bladder. He was doubtful because problems with the gall bladder generally happen with 'chunky people'... I did not fall into that category. They did an ultrasound to check the gall bladder out. Turns out that there is just 'sludge'. (I read it on my chart... not too sure if I am to read that but if they are going to stick in my lap I am going to read it.) Anyway, they then decide to do a CT scan which just confirmed something else for me: I am not pregnant. Apparently they cannot do a CT scan if you are pregnant. That's beside's the point. CT scans are wierd. First I had to drink a litre and a half of this stuff called tetrilix (I think) and I had an hour to drink it. This amount of 'water' plus the 200ml/hr that the IV was pumping in me made me have to pee every 45 mintues I swear. The nurses had me lie down on this thing and they covered me with this blanket that I swear was just out of the dryer... it was so warm and welcomed. The nurse then tells me that she is going to inject something in me that will give me this warm sensation all over my body and oh yeah, the sensation like you are peeing. First it was not a 'warm' sensation. I was bloody hot. Second, I totally thought I was wetting my gown (wasn't wearing pants) but it was really hot. Thankfully there was no urinating because that would have made things awkward for everyone.
Back to the hospital room I went. Keep in mind I am still in Emerg and it was now Sunday afternoon. The CT scan showed that I had an inflammed appendix. By this point Morphine was not allowed to visit me. This was fine because there really was not any pain. So a resident surgeon came in and told me that I had this inflammation and that I would need surgery. I was okay with this. Then her 'boss' surgeon came in and told me that I would most likely not need it considering I was not in any pain. I was slightly disappointed. I would not have minded laying in a hospital for a few days (remember that for later) I never had surgery before. I asked if I could have something to eat and he just said I could drink something... oh yippee it felt like i had not drank anything for ages (note: sarcasm). It is Sunday night and I had not eaten or really drank anything for over 24 hours. I can get combative when I have not eaten.
A little while later I was in a different hospital room in an actual bed that was so much more comfortable. The woman in the same room was just out of surgery and was in pain, was crying... I did not sleep well. Although, in hospitals how much sleep can you really achieve. As soon as you fall asleep a nurse is waking you up to take blood or vitals or asking how you are.
They moved me the next day into the lounge... yes the lounge. Apparently I was not 'bad enough' to warrant an actual room with a comfortable bed. The only good thing about the lounge was that I had my own free cable.
By Monday night the Dr. finally came back and asked me if I wanted to go home. I said yes. About a half hour before this I was crying because I was tired of being in the hospital and not knowing what was going on with me. I mainly said yes because I just wanted to eat something. It was Monday night 6:15 and I was finally allowed to eat... over 48 hours without food. I wondered how that was really possible since I did not really have hunger pains. Apparently the nurse was giving me drugs so my stomach would not start eating itself.
I still do not know what happened... I may have some 3rd world virus. I am leaving my life to God.

Nicaragua

2007-02-28T09:20:00.000-08:00

I have just returned from Nicaragua where I was doing a volunteer project with 15 other students.

We flew from Calgary to Houston to Managua and from there we drove in mini buses to San Juan Del Sur. The drive from Managua to San Juan was about 3 hours long. The roads there are not even comparable to the roads here. They have potholes the size of smart cars. Drivers will swerve to miss them so sleeping is not really an option because when they swerve you question whether you are about to go over a cliff or run into a wild dog.

San Juan Del Sur is a beautiful little town but unfortunately is turning into a touristy place for gringos (Americanos). I say unfortunately because there is nothing more that I hate than when a really poor country or community is exploited when Americans come in and develop 5 star hotels leaving the poor even worse off. None of the money they make goes back into the community. It is really sad. Those living at the bottom of the hill, in respect to the 5 star hotel, do not have water running or electricity running 24/7. The hotel does. We lived with families and were able to experience somewhat how they live everyday. Granted we did live in the 'nicer houses'.

The communities we went to were pretty bad. They did not have running water and had to get their water from a well that is most likely contaminated from their latrines. We were told not to drink the water or we would get sick. They did not have proper stoves with ventillation which made respiratory disease huge. The picture below is a photo of one family's stove. Notice that there is no chimney here. So all the smoke from their fire goes up into the air of that house. There is no proper ventillation. Imagine standing in front of a campfire in an enclosed space three or four times a day. This is exactly what was happening for these people. Which explaines the respiratory diseases.

The experience was quite humbling because I recall whining about my little one bedroom basement suite when all they had was the house pictured here.

Their latrine looked like the outhouse pictured here also. To the left of the latrine is where we were building a composting toilet so their water wells would not become contaminated.

The circumstances we walked in upon were very sad indeed but they had to be the most humble people I have ever met. One community in Capulin bought the lot of us (16) fruit to eat on our lunch break. At the end of the day when we were leaving their community for good they thanked us for what we were doing for them and we danced on their front lawns. it was pretty fun.

With all the hard work we did have fun there. We went on a boat ride from hell that consisted of a beautiful sunset.

The hell part arose when it became darker and the winds were muy fuerte (very strong). So there we were riding in this boat in the dark of night with the strong wind and firehose like spray coming off the waves and straight into those on the boat. I did not want to go swimming because I would be cold on the way home. So much for my plan. Everyone on that boat was drenched. Others were enjoying it a little too much. By the end of that ride the a few of us were not impressed about it and suggested that they not do this again next year.

The trip has changed me in many ways. Ways that I am not even aware of yet. I know that I see things differently, like running water. I try not to waste it. I will admit that I enjoy being able to come home with the assurance that my water is running and I can go to the bathroom but I also know that somewhere else in the world there are people who go without. I love the assurance of knowing that when it is really windy a piece of my roof will not fly off. I am gratful for everything that God has blessed me with in my life and I hope I never forget this experience and what it has taught me. I realise that even though I am blessed in many materialistic ways these people are blessed in ways that others cannot see and when they do see how those others are blessed they themselves are humbled by it.

shock the rock

2007-01-01T11:54:00.000-08:00

The new year has started out fantastic with me. I have kept all my new years resolutions, mainly because I did not make any. I find New Years to be dramatic and over rated. I have no problem staying at home and getting an early night to bed (I'm so old).
Aside from this, I started a new position at work. For those of you who do not know, I work at The Salvation Army Centre of Hope (not a thrift store... I don't even get a staff discount). The centre of hope is a homeless shelter. I have been working there for about 5 years. Before I started my fab position I had a love hate relationship with the place. Okay, so the love hate thing is still there but I get more money.
So, my new position is called Major.. kidding. I'm not a part of the Army at all, just a worker there. I am a Resource Counselor. Essentially resourcefully counsel people who live at the shelter. I refer them to external agencies and internal programs. Being a Resource Counselor is a fun job but it is such a busy one. Today was the first day that I actually left on time and I still did not finish what needed to be done. Ugh. Tomorrow is a new day.
At the shelter we have free beds and rental rooms. My boss wanted myself and my colleague to check on all the rental rooms (approx. 75-80 may be just a bit less; may be more). She wanted to make sure that people were following the policy and rules (no smoking; no perishable food; no fire hazards; no drugs/alcohol; etc). Last Thursday we undertook this task and set out on our huge job. We got about half way done when we opened the door and the first thing we noticed was a space heater (huge fire hazard). Almost simultaneously the smell hit me and my head turned to another part of the room and there he was. The man renting the room was dead on his bed. We were both in shock and ran to my colleague's office and called security and they came up and called EMS (911) and they took care of it.
I have to say it was one of the most shocking things I have ever seen. I will not describe the scene but let me just say I will never wish that upon anyone. The client we found, a man whom I had been dealing with for a little bit, was completely unrecognisable. Not because of how he died (it may have been natural but it could have been suidice; we don't know) it was because of how much 'weight' it looked like he had gained (his body bloated alot). So anyway... it was not pleasant. I was in a bit of a shock and it takes much to shock me.
The closest I have come to finding a dead person prior to this was when my roommates ex boyfriend tried to commit suicide and I found him in time to call 911.
My reason for telling this story is simply to get it out of my head. It is like a debriefing of sorts. Oddly it has not caused me to think of my own mortality but rather you never know just what is going on in another's mind. Prior to finding him I had thought to myself that I had not seen this person in a few days (he saw me in my office quite a bit: almost daily basis) but I never went to check his room.... you just never know. My advice: if you have an impression about someone act on it. Do not wait. There is a reason for the impression in your mind.

Fire and smoke

2006-12-12T08:29:00.000-08:00

My husband and I like to experiment with cooking sometimes. Before we were married we decided that we would make falafels. They are actually quite easy to make. So we ventured and made them for our friends. While we were making them my husband and I were discussing grease fires. I told him that you always put baking soda on a grease fire and never water because it would spread it more. So not even a minute later there was a small grease fire on the stove and Dave reaches for the water. Luckily the fire went out as quick as it started or we would have been dead.

My husband and I have been married for four months now and it has been wedded bliss from day one.

We stayed in Banff at the Buffalo Mountain Lodge and it was amazing. They had a the best pillows on the bed and let me tell you, I was dang close to taking one. The bathroom was bigger than my bedroom. It was awesome.

Dave is a romantic and since there was a fireplace in the room we decided to sit in front of the fire. So I sat on the bed waiting for him to start the fire. He was showing off his boy scout fire building skills. Within about 3 seconds of him lighting the fire smoke was billowing out from the fireplace. When I saw billowing... I mean billowing. The ceilings in the room are vaulted and fire alarm is probably at the highest point. My husband is not a tall man and so there he was jumping on the bed in his boxers waving a towel in the general direction of the fire alarm. Meanwhile, I calmly walked over to the fireplace, opened the flu and went outside.

Recently my husband was making cookies and rather than crowd the kitchen I asked him if he could toast me a bagel. He lovingly said yes. So he is doing two things at once. He put the butter in the microwave to soften it. I did not see him do this, I only saw the big flame that englufed the butter two seconds after putting it in there. Dave never saw the flame, he only heard the paper sparking up. So he quickly opened the door and blew it out... shut the door and it started on fire again. So he blew it out again. Dave knew not to put foiled paper in the microwave and all he said was "well, you know I can't do two things at once"... thus making it my fault the fire started, even though I was in the other room.

Shiny Happy People

2006-11-16T14:39:00.000-08:00

Yes, it's true... Two posts in one day but I was motivated by a friend's blog today. She wrote a blog entitled "lot's of good people in the world". In this blog she posted 10+ statements about people in her life and never telling which statement was directed at whom. It was great. So please find your names on the left and try to match it to the statement that best applies to you. Okay I'm totally kidding. But I will post some statements now.

1. You are a breath of fresh air in a smog ridden city.
2. Your strength simply amazes me. I wish I had half as much strength as you.
3. You are the most supportive and loving person I have ever met. How did I get so luck as to have you in my life?
4. Your wit astounds me. You should consider standup.
5. Your perseverance and willing to endure to the end is simply incredible. You never quit! I love it!
6. You deserve the best, go get it! With all your heart take what you deserve!!
7. We need to be neighbours so we can quilt, write journals, have our children be best friends... You are awesome!
8. Machine. No other word describes you. You are able to the work of ten and still keep going. Where the heck do you get your energy? Do you have an IV of red bull??
9. You are one of the most honest people I know. Don't change that... Even if people get mad.
10. I wish you could stand up for yourself more. I see so much strength and so much spirit in you. Take a stand and do not let people walk all over you. You are a beautiful person with so much to offer... Find your voice.
11. We have lost touch and I am sad. I miss hearing your voice.
12. Shock and awe... Shock and awe.
13. You are the most free spirited person. You do what is in your heart and do not take crap from anyone. Good on ya but chill out sometimes... Not everyone means to hurt you.
14. We need to hang out more. I miss the good talks we've shared. It's sad we do not talk as much or at all anymore. You have helped me through so much.
15. You live your life without question. You see what you want and you take it. You live life by your rules and no one else's. I love you!
16. Confusion about life befalls us all but listen to your spirit and what it is trying to tell you. Do what is right.
17. We think the same... I like that.

Ring On My Friend.. Ring on...

2006-11-16T11:39:00.000-08:00

We all have mobiles and if you don't you have probably contemplated getting one. I got my first mobile phone when I was, well it was long enough ago that I can't remember, and I loved my phone. This was not my first encounter with the likes of technology. For some unknown reason I acquired a pager when I was just out of highschool or just about to graduate. I thought I was cool, others thought I was a drug deal... Maybe I was both, I guess you'll never know. The one thing that sucked about having a pager is not having the quarter or phone nearby to call and check the message or call the person back. So, like the Jefferson's, I was movin' on up.
It was probably in 99 that I got my first mobile phone and like the pager I thought I was totally cool and others again, thought I had other motives. I was fascinated with the freedom it gave me and that anyone could get a hold of me whenever and wherever, especially in an emergency. It's awesome, I can call the transit number and see how long I have to wait for the bus while freezing my can off in the winter time. It's wonderful. Being able to call and see when the bus is coming is my favorite part of having this phone. Most people acquire mobile phones with business or if for personal use it is only for emergencies. How long did it take you before you broke that rule? I'll be honest, it was all about the cool factor. It's like "Oh don't write your number on paper, I'll just put it in my phone".
Now phones have these great camera's, MP3 players, and what's even better is you can download any ring tone you want. I have downloaded a few... Let's see, Bohemian Rhapsody, Madonna, and I love my current ring tones... Yes I have two... I have programmed them to ring when specific people call. I currently have: Sexyback and Love Generation. I love these songs and I even dance to them when someone calls... But I'm weird like that. Ring tones are hilarious because we all want these great songs on our phone when people call us but the funny part about this is the reaction. Not from those around us but the owners of the mobile. For example, I was on my way to school this morning, riding the big blue limo (public transit) and this guy's mobile phone starts to ring, I was trying to make out the song but it was some rap crap music. The funniest part about it was his reaction to his phone ringing. I don't think I have ever seen someone try to answer their phone so fast and quiet the 'music'. I have seen others do this and I have done it too. Why? I really am not sure. But my advice is this... If you like the music let it ring on my friend... ring on!

Winter is Upon Us.

2006-11-09T09:20:00.000-08:00

The first sign of winter is generally the first frost or snowfall. Being in a prairie province (Alberta) there are not four seasons but only two: winter and construction. The season of construction allows you to wear whatever you want and as little of it.
I have to disagree with the first sign of winter. The first sign of winter is the appearance of down jackets, gloves and toques (beanies for all you yanks out there). Now this appearance is not all together an attractive one. Jackets are generally big and puffy which, if you are girl, completely hide your most promising qualities. I am one of those people who refuses to believe it's cold outside. I will wear a light jacket to the last possible moment. I truly do find winter to the most unattractive season as far as fashion is concerned.
This appearance of down jackets and gloves and toques makes it hard to recognise the attractiveness of a person of the opposite sex. Just think about it for a second, you are on the ski hill and watching the great moves of another person whom you think is the opposite sex of you. Upon realisation (after you hit on them) you see that this person was in fact the same sex as you. With feelings of extreme embarassment you walk away cursing yourself under your breath because you mistook someone for the opposite sex as you. Not only that, but you seriously question your own sexuality.

Think about this

2006-10-26T07:57:00.000-07:00

Recently I have recieved emails about animal rights and signing petitions to speak for those who cannot speak for themselves. I have no problem signing petitions for good causes. Although, email petitions don't hold much legal ground considering I could easily go through the phonebook and make up my own list without having to send it to anyone.
Here is my problem, I received this email about 3 times in response to a horrible incident involving a dog and two teenagers. These teenagers treated this animal disgustingly and I got sick just reading the article. The possible sentence time was 6 months in jail and possible fines. I say good for the system. The bastards should be in jail and recieve fines. What they did was disgusting... So here comes my problem: the fact that I recieved an email that explained all this and how disgusting it was and how these kids should have done to them what they did to this dog and we should petition for animal abusers to get more jail time but yet we allow much worse things to happen to our own 'kind' with barely a bloody peep. We sit back and allow killing of men women and children, raping of women, etc. all over the world and we do not say a word. We do not have petitions out to send to get our government to get involved snd make some changes. We constantly allow our justice system to slap the hands of rapists and killers with the most minimal sentences possible... I really don't get it. When did it become more indecent to kill animals when people in society are killing LIKE animals?

2006-10-24T11:23:00.000-07:00

I will share with you one of my hugest pet peeves... people who use the handicap button to open a door when they are not handicapped (physically or mentally). How hard is it to open the door? By the time the door opens for you, you could have gone through it three or four times.

my other pet peeve is those emails that somehow force you to forward them on to ten people telling you if you do you will receive either good luck, true love, or even better: money and if you don't send them you will have no love, no luck and no money. Well, I don't know about you but I read them, laugh and delete them. To this day I have made more than 1.5$ million a year, am in love, and consider myself dang lucky. Okay so I don't have that much money or really a lot of money but who cares... I have the others. Two out of three aint bad.

I do not have any other major pet peeves... as of yet. I'll keep ya posted

bandwagon anyone.

2006-10-24T11:09:00.000-07:00

So I decided to jump on the bandwagon of starting a blog. I may get very bored very quickly and not put anything up here for long periods of time. So come and go as you please. really I started this because I am a huge follower and have nothing else to do with my time. I don't want to be left out.
I should state right away, I am married so if you are looking to hook up, look elsewhere. I'm not interested.
Right now I have not much to say about anything in particular.